I Feel Guilty

I encountered weirdness on the subway this afternoon en route to a doctor's appointment.

On the platform just after letting myself through the turnstile, this guy on the other side said "Please open the door!"

"What?"

"Please open the door! He lost his rye!"

"What? I'm sorry?"

"He! He lost his rye, see?"

"What? I'm sorry I can't understand..."

There was a second man standing motionless and confused in the tunrstile (one of the floor-to-ceiling ones that cannot be jumped).

Ah! He lost his ride.

I think what was happening was that the first guy wanted me to push open the emergency door so that the second guy could get onto the train.

But.

How do I know that the second guy really lost his ride? And what does that even mean? What if it was a scam and he was trying to get through without paying? I do not support turnstile jumpers. In fact, I always want to fight people who sneak onto the train. Who do these people think they are? Nobody gets to ride for free! Not that I would actually fight, because obviously I would be detroyed and $2 for the MTA just isn't worth it.

Second of all, how do you lose your ride? Like was he not fast enough? Did he push the turnstile the wrong way?

Third of all, is it my responsibility to determine who does and does not ride the train?

And finally, there was no way I was going to push open the emergency door because it said "EMERGENCY EXIT PUSH TO OPEN ALARM WILL SOUND."

Wonder Years Moment: I am still freaked out about rollerskating (even though I've been having recurring dreams about rollerskating since I moved to NYC - tangent - I had a dream the other night that I was stung on the toe by a really small jellyfish and had to miss a Madonna concert because of it and Madonna was pissed) because circa first grade on a rollerskating field trip of some sort I skated out of control into the emergency door and the alarm sounded and everyone looked at me and started laughing.

I didn't want to be the loser who opens the emergency door. I didn't want everyone to look at me when the alarm went off. I didn't want to be responsible for forcing all of the MTA patrons to hear an alarm for the duration of their platform-waiting. No way!

Plus, I'm sure its against some sort of rule to open an emergency door when there's not an emergency.

Now. If I was D, I'd have thought "This door is not alarmed. I've never heard an alarm sound. It's no big deal." People with baby carriages must go through that door all the time, right? Actually, now that I'm thinking about it, I think further down on the platform is a non-alarmed door. I should have suggested that to the guy, but I didn't think of it at the time.

Regardless...

I didn't open the door.

And how guilty I felt and still feel!

Seriously. I couldn't face the guy. I felt like such a jerk.

The first guy was begging me on behalf of the second guy. I said "Look, I'm sorry, I don't know what to tell you! It says there's an alarm!" I walked away.

Then again, if the first guy was friends with the second guy, why didn't he just go through and open the emergency door?

I am still feeling bad about it, which is why I am blogging about it. I feel like I was a mean New Yorker, not helping this guy out. Who am I to determine what is right and wrong? Why am I protecting myself when someone just lost their precious $2 ride? Or did he? How did he?

I just don't know.