Hmmmm.
Stamps were 13 cents when I was born.
Interesting....
Friday, January 13, 2006
This Never Would Have Happened in Northampton
Work is hectic these days.
I've been doing the non-stop work thing, with no time to breathe.
I like it this way, except when the non-stop work thing prevents me from having time to eat lunch.
Oh, irritability.
I had three spoonfulls of soup and a piece of bread for lunch.
This is not enough when you didn't eat breakfast (I never eat breakfast), and especially when you didn't have dinner the night before, especially after having had time to eat only three bites of a burrito that day.
I went to Park Slope last night after work to hang out with D and his friend M, who hails from Newton, MA!
We got there at about 7:30. M poured drinks. I had three potato chips and a cookie so as not to completely spoil dinner.
At 8:30 M said "So, you guys hungry?"
"YES!" I screamed. I am an early eater. I like to eat by 8:00 at the latest. This has been a huge source of compromise in my relationship with D. Left to my own devices I'd eat every night at 7 or 7:30. He's the type who eats at 9 or 9:30. The compromise has been to eat at around 8:30.
We left M's apartment and headed to a Colombian restaurant that looked promising. How can you go wrong with sweet potato/plantain mash on the side?
We arrived at about 8:45. Our order was taken at 8:55 after I asked the waitress what everything was on the menu.
At 9:30 the waitress walked by, noticed us, and said "Huh, I wonder what's taking your food so long?"
At 9:45 I was dying.
At 9:55 I was about to fall asleep.
At 10:00 I said "For the LOVE OF GOD IT IS 10:00 AND EVERYONE HAS GOTTEN THEIR FOOD BEFORE US and they got here AFTER US and I think something must have happened to our order and I AM STARVING OH MY GOD I AM GOING TO KILL SOMEONE!!!"
At that point I wasn't even hungry anymore. You know when you get so hungry that you pass the window and can't eat?
"I'm going to have to bring it home and eat it for lunch," I announced. I was so bitchy.
There was much discussion about what could have happened, if they'd lost the order, if it was dropped accidentally, if we ordered something complex, if they ran our of whatever people ordered, etc.
Luckily M was bitchy too. "Should we just leave?" he asked.
Now. It never would have occurred to me to leave. If it was me, I'd have just taken the food, eaten three bites, asked to have it to go, have been completely perturbed and then complained for the remainder of the night about the poor service and the fact that I gave the restaurant twenty of my dollars to be held as a starving hostage.
But M? No. He said "We should just go."
I said "YES!"
D was sad, because he was really looking forward to it. I could tell that he didn't want to leave, but he is not assertive either so said nothing.
We flagged down the waitress and she saw us and was like "Oh! You guys still don't have your food. Weird, huh? I guess I'll go downstairs and tell them to hurry up!"
Nope.
M said "Actually, we're just going to pay for the drinks and leave."
YES!
The waitress said "Oh, ok."
She didn't say "No, I'm sure your orders are just about ready!" or "No, no, let me just double check what's going on!" or "No, wait, is there anything I can do? How about a free drink?"
D felt so very bad. "It's not her fault," he said.
I said "Well, she could have tried to convince us to stay. She could have asked about the food the first time she noticed it wasn't coming half an hour ago."
Then, of course, she didn't bring the check.
Ten minutes later she said "Hey, look, just so you know, your entrees are going to be ready in a few minutes. You can have them, if you want, but you don't have to."
Right. Because they hadn't even started them when we asked ten minutes ago.
So we left!
I was so proud of M for being assertive. I never would have done that.
We left and I was so very irritable and bitchy. I was losing my shit. I wanted to kick things.
"I think I might snap," I said.
As we waited for the train, I wanted to cry.
So... very... tired... hungry... crazy...
D went to White Castle when we got back to Manhattan, and I had a bowl of cereal and was then couldn't sleep because I broke the no-food-past 10:00 pm rule. Nothing like dinner at 11:30!
Which reminds me... I should be having a snack instead of blogging.
Happy Long Weekend, kids!
I've been doing the non-stop work thing, with no time to breathe.
I like it this way, except when the non-stop work thing prevents me from having time to eat lunch.
Oh, irritability.
I had three spoonfulls of soup and a piece of bread for lunch.
This is not enough when you didn't eat breakfast (I never eat breakfast), and especially when you didn't have dinner the night before, especially after having had time to eat only three bites of a burrito that day.
I went to Park Slope last night after work to hang out with D and his friend M, who hails from Newton, MA!
We got there at about 7:30. M poured drinks. I had three potato chips and a cookie so as not to completely spoil dinner.
At 8:30 M said "So, you guys hungry?"
"YES!" I screamed. I am an early eater. I like to eat by 8:00 at the latest. This has been a huge source of compromise in my relationship with D. Left to my own devices I'd eat every night at 7 or 7:30. He's the type who eats at 9 or 9:30. The compromise has been to eat at around 8:30.
We left M's apartment and headed to a Colombian restaurant that looked promising. How can you go wrong with sweet potato/plantain mash on the side?
We arrived at about 8:45. Our order was taken at 8:55 after I asked the waitress what everything was on the menu.
At 9:30 the waitress walked by, noticed us, and said "Huh, I wonder what's taking your food so long?"
At 9:45 I was dying.
At 9:55 I was about to fall asleep.
At 10:00 I said "For the LOVE OF GOD IT IS 10:00 AND EVERYONE HAS GOTTEN THEIR FOOD BEFORE US and they got here AFTER US and I think something must have happened to our order and I AM STARVING OH MY GOD I AM GOING TO KILL SOMEONE!!!"
At that point I wasn't even hungry anymore. You know when you get so hungry that you pass the window and can't eat?
"I'm going to have to bring it home and eat it for lunch," I announced. I was so bitchy.
There was much discussion about what could have happened, if they'd lost the order, if it was dropped accidentally, if we ordered something complex, if they ran our of whatever people ordered, etc.
Luckily M was bitchy too. "Should we just leave?" he asked.
Now. It never would have occurred to me to leave. If it was me, I'd have just taken the food, eaten three bites, asked to have it to go, have been completely perturbed and then complained for the remainder of the night about the poor service and the fact that I gave the restaurant twenty of my dollars to be held as a starving hostage.
But M? No. He said "We should just go."
I said "YES!"
D was sad, because he was really looking forward to it. I could tell that he didn't want to leave, but he is not assertive either so said nothing.
We flagged down the waitress and she saw us and was like "Oh! You guys still don't have your food. Weird, huh? I guess I'll go downstairs and tell them to hurry up!"
Nope.
M said "Actually, we're just going to pay for the drinks and leave."
YES!
The waitress said "Oh, ok."
She didn't say "No, I'm sure your orders are just about ready!" or "No, no, let me just double check what's going on!" or "No, wait, is there anything I can do? How about a free drink?"
D felt so very bad. "It's not her fault," he said.
I said "Well, she could have tried to convince us to stay. She could have asked about the food the first time she noticed it wasn't coming half an hour ago."
Then, of course, she didn't bring the check.
Ten minutes later she said "Hey, look, just so you know, your entrees are going to be ready in a few minutes. You can have them, if you want, but you don't have to."
Right. Because they hadn't even started them when we asked ten minutes ago.
So we left!
I was so proud of M for being assertive. I never would have done that.
We left and I was so very irritable and bitchy. I was losing my shit. I wanted to kick things.
"I think I might snap," I said.
As we waited for the train, I wanted to cry.
So... very... tired... hungry... crazy...
D went to White Castle when we got back to Manhattan, and I had a bowl of cereal and was then couldn't sleep because I broke the no-food-past 10:00 pm rule. Nothing like dinner at 11:30!
Which reminds me... I should be having a snack instead of blogging.
Happy Long Weekend, kids!
Thursday, January 12, 2006
Ah Ha!
As children of the 80’s, we grew up in an environment oversaturated with TV that, while probably boiling our brains, created for us a unique, shared, media-infested pop culture.
When you meet someone remotely your age, you realize that you have this immense thing called the 80’s in common, and with the 80’s comes an obscene amount of TV-related knowledge.
I was saying to someone the other day “Did we do anything but watch TV as children? I think I rode my bike too...”
We watched every cartoon and every sitcom. Everyone watched Growing Pains. We were still in the now-deceased era of the family sitcom, and thus found our elementary school selves watching programs like The Golden Girl and Amen.
I had lunch with my Cousin yesterday (age 20) who said that her generation doesn’t have this shared culture phenomenon, because by the time she was old enough to watch TV all that remained was Full House. Seinfeld took over, and family sitcoms were replaced with sitcoms about nothing or sitcoms about the workplace.
She didn’t have wonderful things like Punky Brewster or Small Wonder or Alf or The Charmings or Just The Ten of Us or 227 or Sister Kate. Poor, poor child.
When we were growing up, in addition to sitcoms, we had fabulous sci-fi-drama crime weeklies like Quantum Leap and Alien Nation and The Flash, and we had the cartoons, most important of which were, of course, She-Ra and Jem and the Holograms.
I admit that there are severe gaps in my TV-knowledge. I’ve never seen an episode of Miami Vice, for example, although I remember watching Chips. There are certain cartoons I just never watched for some reason. I never watched any show that involved a car as a main character.
I don’t claim to have a comprehensive knowledge of all 80’s-related TV trivia. If anything, I probably watched less than many of the people I’ve met.
This being said, in high school, I watched a lot of TV, and things started to change. Northern Exposure was there, but all of a sudden there was Beverly Hills, 90210. And soon there would be Friends.
I watched a lot of TV, and I remember LOVING this show that I swear starred Brad Pitt. I am constantly asking people if they remember this show. “It was a show about four friends, one was a cop or something, one was a journalist, I think one was Italian, and I don't know what the deal was with the fourth one...and they all had very different personalities but still managed to stay best friends! And one of the friends was Brad Pitt!”
Nobody has ever heard of this. I’ve been perplexed for the last, like, 15 years, because there are so many people who watched way more TV than I did, yet nobody has any recollection of this show!
“Brad Pitt was on Growing Pains. That’s what you’re thinking of…” people say. “I obviously KNOW THAT HE WAS ON THAT. He was ALSO on this other show.”
Everyone thought me insane.
Last night I went home after work and had about an hour to kill before D came over for dinner. I was excited to cook dinner for us – we haven’t had dinner in together for almost a month, and we normally do this all the time. I played a little piano and became really frustrated (am in over my head with Music Project du Jour), so decided to, whoa, watch TV… again!
This time I watched Entertainment Tonight. I can’t believe Mary Hart is still hosting. Nevertheless… much news about Angelina Jolie’s pregnancy! After the commercial, they said, will be shown footage of Angelina and Brad BEFORE they were stars.
“Oh my god!” I thought. “Could I possibly be lucky enough that they will show footage from the Brad Pitt mystery show? Please please please… Please, Entertainment Tonight, don’t fail me now. Help me, Entertainment Tonight, you’re my only hope!”
Held hostage by Entertainment Tonight, I suffered through post-People’s Choice Awards footage of Jessica Simpson talking about how happy she is to have the support of her family at such a difficult time. Ugh.
What seemed like three hundred commercial breaks later, more Angelina and Brad! They showed footage of large-toothed Angelina from when she was an awkward 12-year-old at some awards show with John Voigt. There was no way to have predicted that she would turn out stunning! There is hope for you all, awkward 12 years old of America!
And then… drum roll… early career footage of Brad Pitt during his time on the short-lived Fox drama… drum rolling… Glory Days!
EUREEKA!!!!
All of my teen angst and sexual frustration came rushing at me when I heard those two words.
Oh. My. God. I loved that show.
Of course I checked to see if it is out on DVD, but it is not.
Damn, son.
Content, I turned off Entertainment Tonight and made dinner.
D arrived, soaked (it rained! but can we really complain given the weather this week?) with a bottle of wine to (a) assist in his coping with his terribly stressful day at work and (b) test out the Houdini corkscrew I got for Christmas! It is truly magic.
We ate dinner, finished the bottle even though I’d said earlier “I can’t drink that much tonight because I have a brutal day at work tomorrow and have to get in early” to which he’d said “Me too – I’m tired, I don’t want to drink,” had fabulous conversations, made and then devoured chocolate chip cookies.
In one of the conversations, D was going on and on about how in some way he wished we’d lose our jobs, because forced motivation to change one's life is the best kind. "It's hard to overcome intertia," he said. I, of course, agreed, my currently wonderful life having been the direct result of my having been laid off a few years ago.
He said “We should come up with a plan.”
“What?”
“We have to come up with a plan. Like, say we go in tomorrow and lose our jobs, what’s the plan?”
“Move somewhere that’s really cheap. We won’t need to worry about jobs for a while because we have enough money saved between the two of us to live somewhere for a decent time without working. We break our leases tomorrow, pack up, and head to wherever. When we get there, we regroup. We figure out if we want to continue our current careers, and if so, where. If not, then we figure out what we want to do with our lives, find a place with a really cheap cost of living but with really good schools, and then I become a photographer, because I really want to.”
“You should! We should move to Savannah!” he said, because of some art or design school down there that would be ideal. He said “You’d really like it.”
Then “Or Northampton… I would love to live in Northampton. I’d rather live there than in Boston,” he said.
WHAT?!?! How did I not know this!??!
“I’d actually love to live there. Seriously.”
“There aren’t many jobs for chemists,” I said. “But you could work in a lab at UMass!!”
“Could I?”
“I bet there are companies. There must be companies! You wouldn't need a car!”
Can you imagine me commuting on the PVTA? Yes! YES!
“It would be actually be quite ideal. Close to Boston, close to New York, there's nature, hiking, there are a ton of cyclists in Northampton, it's cultured…”
“Every show that comes through New York goes through western MA…”
… the record store sucks, though.”
“No it doesn’t! But there are good ones in Amherst… and New York is only a few hours away!”
“Yeah, it would be awesome to live in Northampton.”
“I could get a BA from UMass,” I said. “I wonder if I’d need to give them copies of my transcript since I already went there.”
I could take Social Dance II!
“You’ll have to take the SATs.”
We laughed.
This morning I woke up and said “I hope we lose our jobs today.”
When you meet someone remotely your age, you realize that you have this immense thing called the 80’s in common, and with the 80’s comes an obscene amount of TV-related knowledge.
I was saying to someone the other day “Did we do anything but watch TV as children? I think I rode my bike too...”
We watched every cartoon and every sitcom. Everyone watched Growing Pains. We were still in the now-deceased era of the family sitcom, and thus found our elementary school selves watching programs like The Golden Girl and Amen.
I had lunch with my Cousin yesterday (age 20) who said that her generation doesn’t have this shared culture phenomenon, because by the time she was old enough to watch TV all that remained was Full House. Seinfeld took over, and family sitcoms were replaced with sitcoms about nothing or sitcoms about the workplace.
She didn’t have wonderful things like Punky Brewster or Small Wonder or Alf or The Charmings or Just The Ten of Us or 227 or Sister Kate. Poor, poor child.
When we were growing up, in addition to sitcoms, we had fabulous sci-fi-drama crime weeklies like Quantum Leap and Alien Nation and The Flash, and we had the cartoons, most important of which were, of course, She-Ra and Jem and the Holograms.
I admit that there are severe gaps in my TV-knowledge. I’ve never seen an episode of Miami Vice, for example, although I remember watching Chips. There are certain cartoons I just never watched for some reason. I never watched any show that involved a car as a main character.
I don’t claim to have a comprehensive knowledge of all 80’s-related TV trivia. If anything, I probably watched less than many of the people I’ve met.
This being said, in high school, I watched a lot of TV, and things started to change. Northern Exposure was there, but all of a sudden there was Beverly Hills, 90210. And soon there would be Friends.
I watched a lot of TV, and I remember LOVING this show that I swear starred Brad Pitt. I am constantly asking people if they remember this show. “It was a show about four friends, one was a cop or something, one was a journalist, I think one was Italian, and I don't know what the deal was with the fourth one...and they all had very different personalities but still managed to stay best friends! And one of the friends was Brad Pitt!”
Nobody has ever heard of this. I’ve been perplexed for the last, like, 15 years, because there are so many people who watched way more TV than I did, yet nobody has any recollection of this show!
“Brad Pitt was on Growing Pains. That’s what you’re thinking of…” people say. “I obviously KNOW THAT HE WAS ON THAT. He was ALSO on this other show.”
Everyone thought me insane.
Last night I went home after work and had about an hour to kill before D came over for dinner. I was excited to cook dinner for us – we haven’t had dinner in together for almost a month, and we normally do this all the time. I played a little piano and became really frustrated (am in over my head with Music Project du Jour), so decided to, whoa, watch TV… again!
This time I watched Entertainment Tonight. I can’t believe Mary Hart is still hosting. Nevertheless… much news about Angelina Jolie’s pregnancy! After the commercial, they said, will be shown footage of Angelina and Brad BEFORE they were stars.
“Oh my god!” I thought. “Could I possibly be lucky enough that they will show footage from the Brad Pitt mystery show? Please please please… Please, Entertainment Tonight, don’t fail me now. Help me, Entertainment Tonight, you’re my only hope!”
Held hostage by Entertainment Tonight, I suffered through post-People’s Choice Awards footage of Jessica Simpson talking about how happy she is to have the support of her family at such a difficult time. Ugh.
What seemed like three hundred commercial breaks later, more Angelina and Brad! They showed footage of large-toothed Angelina from when she was an awkward 12-year-old at some awards show with John Voigt. There was no way to have predicted that she would turn out stunning! There is hope for you all, awkward 12 years old of America!
And then… drum roll… early career footage of Brad Pitt during his time on the short-lived Fox drama… drum rolling… Glory Days!
EUREEKA!!!!
All of my teen angst and sexual frustration came rushing at me when I heard those two words.
Oh. My. God. I loved that show.
Of course I checked to see if it is out on DVD, but it is not.
Damn, son.
Content, I turned off Entertainment Tonight and made dinner.
D arrived, soaked (it rained! but can we really complain given the weather this week?) with a bottle of wine to (a) assist in his coping with his terribly stressful day at work and (b) test out the Houdini corkscrew I got for Christmas! It is truly magic.
We ate dinner, finished the bottle even though I’d said earlier “I can’t drink that much tonight because I have a brutal day at work tomorrow and have to get in early” to which he’d said “Me too – I’m tired, I don’t want to drink,” had fabulous conversations, made and then devoured chocolate chip cookies.
In one of the conversations, D was going on and on about how in some way he wished we’d lose our jobs, because forced motivation to change one's life is the best kind. "It's hard to overcome intertia," he said. I, of course, agreed, my currently wonderful life having been the direct result of my having been laid off a few years ago.
He said “We should come up with a plan.”
“What?”
“We have to come up with a plan. Like, say we go in tomorrow and lose our jobs, what’s the plan?”
“Move somewhere that’s really cheap. We won’t need to worry about jobs for a while because we have enough money saved between the two of us to live somewhere for a decent time without working. We break our leases tomorrow, pack up, and head to wherever. When we get there, we regroup. We figure out if we want to continue our current careers, and if so, where. If not, then we figure out what we want to do with our lives, find a place with a really cheap cost of living but with really good schools, and then I become a photographer, because I really want to.”
“You should! We should move to Savannah!” he said, because of some art or design school down there that would be ideal. He said “You’d really like it.”
Then “Or Northampton… I would love to live in Northampton. I’d rather live there than in Boston,” he said.
WHAT?!?! How did I not know this!??!
“I’d actually love to live there. Seriously.”
“There aren’t many jobs for chemists,” I said. “But you could work in a lab at UMass!!”
“Could I?”
“I bet there are companies. There must be companies! You wouldn't need a car!”
Can you imagine me commuting on the PVTA? Yes! YES!
“It would be actually be quite ideal. Close to Boston, close to New York, there's nature, hiking, there are a ton of cyclists in Northampton, it's cultured…”
“Every show that comes through New York goes through western MA…”
… the record store sucks, though.”
“No it doesn’t! But there are good ones in Amherst… and New York is only a few hours away!”
“Yeah, it would be awesome to live in Northampton.”
“I could get a BA from UMass,” I said. “I wonder if I’d need to give them copies of my transcript since I already went there.”
I could take Social Dance II!
“You’ll have to take the SATs.”
We laughed.
This morning I woke up and said “I hope we lose our jobs today.”
Wednesday, January 11, 2006
Antenna
I had no plans last night (no plans! no plans!!! yippee!!!) so went home, worked on music project du jour for a few hours, and then thought "Huh, I should probably eat something."
While microwaving some macaroni and cheese, I remembered "Wait! I have an antenna! I should watch... TV! This will be a perfect activity for my non-functioning brain post blitz on music project du jour!"
I watched a bit of The Gilmore Girls (I heart Luke) and when it ended, tried to decide if I wanted to continue the mind-numbing TV exercise or read The New Yorker, with which I also have a love/hate relationship.
Flipping through the channels, I came across an awards show! The People's Choice Awards! I love awards shows! Well, not really, but they have the potential to entertain. The People's Choice Awards are probably the lowest common denominator (because do "the people" have the best taste? probably not!), although I'm not sure of this as I've never seen them.
I began to watch, and was horrified by the opening number - Jessica Simpson, dressed as a cowgirl, singing "These boots were made for walking... uh... yip... etc." whilst trying not to kill herself as she walked on barstools.
I tried not to scream. I was patient. The host came on - I've never seen this guy before - and was completely unfunny.
After I watched adorable Reese Witherspoon accept her award for "Favorite Leading Lady," I turned away. I thought "I should stop watching... this will be torture."
I was still on the fence, until the announcer said "After the break, we'll announce the winner you've chosen for BEST HAIR!" or something like that. It wasn't even best hair - it was most natural or most luxurious or most satiny hair or something equally ridiculous sponsored by some hair product company.
Needless to say I spent the remainder of the night reading The New Yorker.
Not that The New Yorker is any better.
I have this compulsion to read it because I feel like I should read it. It's the hip thing to do. Everyone's doing it. D subscribes and gives me his copy every week after he's finished reading it. D is so good about reading. He reads everything. He keeps up with every zine, magazine, publication, everything. I don't understand how he has so much time.
I asked him if we could enact this policy as I didn't want to spend the money on a subscription to something I resent for no apparent reason.
Is it because its pretentious? Is it pretentious? Or is reading it pretentious? Or maybe the problem is the cartoons? Some of them are funny, though...
I think the thing that bothers me about it is that the articles are so long. You need an hour to read one article!
This policy has been in effect for about eight months, and in all honesty, I think I've read maybe four issues. I've glanced through a few others.
One of my resolutions that didn't make it onto the blog list was to read The New Yorker every week, or to at least attempt to. I suppose its a companion resolution to being better about read The Voice.
I read most of last week's issue. I read all but two articles of this week's issue last night.
The hilarious thing is that on Sunday night, D and I were reading together (we now set aside time to "read" when we are together since we both want to read more). I declared, frustrated, "Dear god this article on Katrina is eternal!"
D said "Really? You'll have to tell me about it when you finish it."
"What?"
"You'll have to tell me about it when you finish it."
"Wait. What?"
"What?"
"You didn't read it?"
"No."
"Did you read any of the other articles?"
"No."
"Do you ever read the articles?"
"Sometimes. It depends."
Hah.
Now I don't feel so bad.
I guess you don't have to read The New Yorker to be a true New Yorker.
While microwaving some macaroni and cheese, I remembered "Wait! I have an antenna! I should watch... TV! This will be a perfect activity for my non-functioning brain post blitz on music project du jour!"
I watched a bit of The Gilmore Girls (I heart Luke) and when it ended, tried to decide if I wanted to continue the mind-numbing TV exercise or read The New Yorker, with which I also have a love/hate relationship.
Flipping through the channels, I came across an awards show! The People's Choice Awards! I love awards shows! Well, not really, but they have the potential to entertain. The People's Choice Awards are probably the lowest common denominator (because do "the people" have the best taste? probably not!), although I'm not sure of this as I've never seen them.
I began to watch, and was horrified by the opening number - Jessica Simpson, dressed as a cowgirl, singing "These boots were made for walking... uh... yip... etc." whilst trying not to kill herself as she walked on barstools.
I tried not to scream. I was patient. The host came on - I've never seen this guy before - and was completely unfunny.
After I watched adorable Reese Witherspoon accept her award for "Favorite Leading Lady," I turned away. I thought "I should stop watching... this will be torture."
I was still on the fence, until the announcer said "After the break, we'll announce the winner you've chosen for BEST HAIR!" or something like that. It wasn't even best hair - it was most natural or most luxurious or most satiny hair or something equally ridiculous sponsored by some hair product company.
Needless to say I spent the remainder of the night reading The New Yorker.
Not that The New Yorker is any better.
I have this compulsion to read it because I feel like I should read it. It's the hip thing to do. Everyone's doing it. D subscribes and gives me his copy every week after he's finished reading it. D is so good about reading. He reads everything. He keeps up with every zine, magazine, publication, everything. I don't understand how he has so much time.
I asked him if we could enact this policy as I didn't want to spend the money on a subscription to something I resent for no apparent reason.
Is it because its pretentious? Is it pretentious? Or is reading it pretentious? Or maybe the problem is the cartoons? Some of them are funny, though...
I think the thing that bothers me about it is that the articles are so long. You need an hour to read one article!
This policy has been in effect for about eight months, and in all honesty, I think I've read maybe four issues. I've glanced through a few others.
One of my resolutions that didn't make it onto the blog list was to read The New Yorker every week, or to at least attempt to. I suppose its a companion resolution to being better about read The Voice.
I read most of last week's issue. I read all but two articles of this week's issue last night.
The hilarious thing is that on Sunday night, D and I were reading together (we now set aside time to "read" when we are together since we both want to read more). I declared, frustrated, "Dear god this article on Katrina is eternal!"
D said "Really? You'll have to tell me about it when you finish it."
"What?"
"You'll have to tell me about it when you finish it."
"Wait. What?"
"What?"
"You didn't read it?"
"No."
"Did you read any of the other articles?"
"No."
"Do you ever read the articles?"
"Sometimes. It depends."
Hah.
Now I don't feel so bad.
I guess you don't have to read The New Yorker to be a true New Yorker.
Tuesday, January 10, 2006
Separation
I am just torn apart by the announcement that Hilary Swank and Chad Lowe have separated. I can't believe it. If they can't make it, nobody can!
Sad, I am.
Sad, I am.
Monday, January 09, 2006
The Weekend In Review
New Roc City = ghetto Las Vegas. My friend LL hatched an elaborate plan that involved going to see a movie in New Roc City, after which would be a sleepover at her place in The Bronx. The original plan had me going up to the Bronx after work, only to be driven half an hour to New Roc City. (Well, the original plan, which was designed by yours truly, was “Girl’s Not Out” involving dinner at a fancy Manhattan restaurant, fancy martinis, and gay cowboys). Luckily the Metro North goes straight to New Roc City, so I was able to eliminate an hour and a half of extra transit. I wasn’t prepared for New Roc City. I thought it would be a spectacle, but I hadn’t thought that it would be a spectacle surrounded by sketchiness. The minute I stepped foot off the train I knew I was in for a treat. I asked a woman for directions. As she began to speak, another woman interjected and said “NO! DON’T GO THAT WAY!” and gave me better directions. Yeah. It wasn’t, well, a pleasant place to be walking around by oneself at night.
Brokeback Mountain = A-MAZ-ING. It was so sad that I was not even able to cry. I can't get enough of Jake's dimples or Heath's brooding. And Jen from Dawson's Creek was awesome. The whole thing was awesome, and it really had nothing to do with dimples or brooding.
I had a Seinfeld-ian moment when one of the girls I was with engaged in one of my movie theater pet peeves, and I thought “I may have to de-friend her after this.” Spending a lot of time with someone, seeing how he or she lives his of her life, can give you insight that you don’t necessarily want about a person.
After the movies we decided to go to this Mexican restaurant in New Roc City, but left immediately after being seated when we learned that not only was it far too expensive given what it was, but they charged $3.95 to share meals!
We ended up at Applebee’s and shared spinach-artichoke dip while drinking weak martinis. There was karaoke, but we did not partake.
We did not do glow-in-the-dark mini golf because I hated New Roc City and wanted out of there as soon as possible.
I was a zombie by the time we got to The Bronx, but The Girls wanted to stay up. While I tried to sleep on the couch, they watched a movie. Me = irritable.
Slept miraculously well despite being on the couch. My sleep was interrupted only by a nightmare involving D having broken into my apartment while I was gone and having left a pile of dishes in the sink. In the dream I began doing the dishes, only to find that he had cooked meat! I yelled “Not only did he break into my apartment without telling me, not only did he cook in my apartment, not only did he then leave me 100 dishes to wash, but he cooked meat! THAT BASTARD!” Weird.
Breakfast at a local diner, followed by being accosted by some kid on the street trying to sell us hot Disney anthology books or an umbrella. Bizarre.
Journey that lasted for eternity from The Bronx to PS1 via the 6 and then the E, where I was meeting D to see the last weekend of the Stephen Shore exhibit. I almost missed it! I liked the exhibit but was peeved by there being windows in the gallery. You can’t have windows casting sunlight onto glass covering small photos! I was surprised by a Jon Kessler exhibit, which was a four room kinetic sculpture that was one of the coolest things I have ever seen.
Went back to my apartment, which I hadn’t seen in quite some time, where I took a shower and where D successfully installed a new battery into my IPod. Woop!
En route to the screening of my friend E’s student film at Columbia, D said “Hey – do you think that soup place over there is the Soup Nazi?” I said “I don’t know…” and then looked up, only to see that we were standing right on the corner of Restaurant from Seinfeld! “Well, it may not be, but there’s Restaurant!”
We were giddy, but decided not to eat at Restaurant in favor of another cute little restaurant where I ate Pumpkin Gorgonzola risotto and where D did not have the Tang Martini because when our waiter asked the bartender if there was any Tang remaining with which to make the Tangtini, the bartender answered “Yes, but its disgusting.”
E’s movie = awesome. I was so proud!
Fabulous food poisoning or a drug interaction.
Watched “Anchorman” and laughed. Lots.
Watched episodes of Strangers with Candy.
Went to the Ancient Fossils, New Discoveries exhibit at the Museum of Natural History with E. I’ve decided that a museum is the best place to go to convince yourself that you never want children. Or, on the contrary, if you get lucky, yearn for children. The precocious ones are entertaining, but the screamers… oh man, the screamers. There was one kid who was a combination of both, and his adult-ways won and endeared me to him for the hour that we trailed him. He was about six years old and kept frustratingly declaring “We have been in this exhibit for over an hour! I cannot take it anymore!” Tee hee.
Met up with D for a gross burrito and then saw Munich, which was also A-MAZ-ING. I can’t even begin to describe how wonderful it was so I won’t even try. Just go see it, and be prepared to be ruined afterwards.
Sat on the couch for a bit and then read and then, finally, slept like a baby.
And today I ate a salad for lunch! Watch out, world, I am on track with the New Year's resolutions. I don't know if it counts, though, when you have more croutons than lettuce and a ton of cheese. Oh well.
Brokeback Mountain = A-MAZ-ING. It was so sad that I was not even able to cry. I can't get enough of Jake's dimples or Heath's brooding. And Jen from Dawson's Creek was awesome. The whole thing was awesome, and it really had nothing to do with dimples or brooding.
I had a Seinfeld-ian moment when one of the girls I was with engaged in one of my movie theater pet peeves, and I thought “I may have to de-friend her after this.” Spending a lot of time with someone, seeing how he or she lives his of her life, can give you insight that you don’t necessarily want about a person.
After the movies we decided to go to this Mexican restaurant in New Roc City, but left immediately after being seated when we learned that not only was it far too expensive given what it was, but they charged $3.95 to share meals!
We ended up at Applebee’s and shared spinach-artichoke dip while drinking weak martinis. There was karaoke, but we did not partake.
We did not do glow-in-the-dark mini golf because I hated New Roc City and wanted out of there as soon as possible.
I was a zombie by the time we got to The Bronx, but The Girls wanted to stay up. While I tried to sleep on the couch, they watched a movie. Me = irritable.
Slept miraculously well despite being on the couch. My sleep was interrupted only by a nightmare involving D having broken into my apartment while I was gone and having left a pile of dishes in the sink. In the dream I began doing the dishes, only to find that he had cooked meat! I yelled “Not only did he break into my apartment without telling me, not only did he cook in my apartment, not only did he then leave me 100 dishes to wash, but he cooked meat! THAT BASTARD!” Weird.
Breakfast at a local diner, followed by being accosted by some kid on the street trying to sell us hot Disney anthology books or an umbrella. Bizarre.
Journey that lasted for eternity from The Bronx to PS1 via the 6 and then the E, where I was meeting D to see the last weekend of the Stephen Shore exhibit. I almost missed it! I liked the exhibit but was peeved by there being windows in the gallery. You can’t have windows casting sunlight onto glass covering small photos! I was surprised by a Jon Kessler exhibit, which was a four room kinetic sculpture that was one of the coolest things I have ever seen.
Went back to my apartment, which I hadn’t seen in quite some time, where I took a shower and where D successfully installed a new battery into my IPod. Woop!
En route to the screening of my friend E’s student film at Columbia, D said “Hey – do you think that soup place over there is the Soup Nazi?” I said “I don’t know…” and then looked up, only to see that we were standing right on the corner of Restaurant from Seinfeld! “Well, it may not be, but there’s Restaurant!”
We were giddy, but decided not to eat at Restaurant in favor of another cute little restaurant where I ate Pumpkin Gorgonzola risotto and where D did not have the Tang Martini because when our waiter asked the bartender if there was any Tang remaining with which to make the Tangtini, the bartender answered “Yes, but its disgusting.”
E’s movie = awesome. I was so proud!
Fabulous food poisoning or a drug interaction.
Watched “Anchorman” and laughed. Lots.
Watched episodes of Strangers with Candy.
Went to the Ancient Fossils, New Discoveries exhibit at the Museum of Natural History with E. I’ve decided that a museum is the best place to go to convince yourself that you never want children. Or, on the contrary, if you get lucky, yearn for children. The precocious ones are entertaining, but the screamers… oh man, the screamers. There was one kid who was a combination of both, and his adult-ways won and endeared me to him for the hour that we trailed him. He was about six years old and kept frustratingly declaring “We have been in this exhibit for over an hour! I cannot take it anymore!” Tee hee.
Met up with D for a gross burrito and then saw Munich, which was also A-MAZ-ING. I can’t even begin to describe how wonderful it was so I won’t even try. Just go see it, and be prepared to be ruined afterwards.
Sat on the couch for a bit and then read and then, finally, slept like a baby.
And today I ate a salad for lunch! Watch out, world, I am on track with the New Year's resolutions. I don't know if it counts, though, when you have more croutons than lettuce and a ton of cheese. Oh well.
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